~ aZure pLea5ures ~

Moving On

2008-03-01T21:08:00.009+08:00

Hi! Thank you for visiting this blog again.

I acknowledge that I have not updated this blog since March 2006, and since it is now March 2008, it is an exact 2-year period.

The initial passion I had in creating and updating this blog fizzled off in less than a 9-month period. Many factors were at play: being caught up in the busy-ness of life, planning & executing my wedding (Dec 2006), challenges at work followed by a change of job, procrastination, and much soul-searching that led to a total change of perspective of how I viewed life.

This blog ends here and now. If you know me, you know how/where to reach me. When I have a new, active blog again, I will post the link here for you to follow up with my life.

Signing off,
Ai Jou

Long absence

2006-03-04T13:50:00.000+08:00

I haven't blogged for a very, very long time.

Perhaps it was just a passing fad that I jumped into just because others were doing it.

Most of the time, if I'm not working, I'm out running errands (lots of them!), doing chores or spending time with Des, my friends and family. If I had any free time at home, I preferred to spend it relaxing with a good book, the newspaper or staring at the tube.

Well, I guess you can also throw in the fact that I don't have access to the computer as much as I'd like to. The home PC's mostly hogged by my brother with his computer games, and if I do get to use it, I'd prefer to clear my every-increasing email inbox.

Don't be mistaken, I missed blogging. I miss expressing myself with words to no one in particular. Every week or so, I think about blogging. But that's all, I just THINK about it, I never get around to it. I think too much, about what I should write, what I should express. I think to myself, nothing interesting ever happens to me. And sometimes I couldn't allow the words to just flow naturally. It had to be a planned article, something nice to read, beneficial to myself and others.

Well, I am back. I won't think, I'll just blog.

See you soon!

I'm So Blessed

2005-11-27T08:46:00.000+08:00

I apologise for not writing recently.

Life's been the usual... work has been 'streesful' as we go for the final league in meeting clients and getting them to sign up ads in my company's publications; we've also been planning big time for our postgrad fair next year. I've been continuing with the room decorating but it's coming along slow as I don't have much time leftover after work or during weekends.

What's been significant is the metta (loving-kindness) discussion group that I've started attending under Bro Hor Tuck Loon's tutelage. It's related to the vipassana (insight) meditation group that I attended under him but it's a different concept altogether.

In this group, we learn about love. How to love ourself, how to love others close to us, how to love our enemies, how to love people we don't know and how to love all beings.

Did you know that we have to love ourself first before we can love others? I've discovered that I don't love myself enough as I don't feel that I'm good enough. And because of that, I often reject love that's coming from others. Not just from men or guys, but from my parents, good friends and teachers.

It's a challenge to love myself, warts and all. But this is the first step towards unconditional love - loving someone (or ourself) without any conditions attached, to love whole-ly and completely.

I hope to be able to experience and practise unconditional love in my heart one day.

Raya Holidays 2005

2005-11-08T06:06:00.000+08:00

Deepavali was on 1 Nov while Hari Raya Puasa was on 3 & 4 Nov. So I took leave on Wednesday, 2 Nov and thus got a long stretch of 6 days holiday including the weekends!

Want to know what I did during the holidays?

Out with the old, in with the new
With the help of Des and my family, we embarked on the largest spring cleaning project we've ever attempted in my room. We moved 1 large bookcase with glass doors, 1 small bookcase, 1 colour box, 1 large study table and 1 small wardrobe out of my room. With that, countless papers, files, books, and other miscelleanous junk went to the recycle and trash bins. We even gave away our whole set of World Book Encyclopedia that we bought in the 90s!

It wasn't an easy task moving and squeezing the furniture out from my room, but we did it! Of course, my Mum, Dad, brother and I had minor arguments with one another on what to keep and what to throw/recycle from my room.

Mum loves her old sewing machine - a gift from her mother - even though it doesn't work properly any more. My brother was attached to the encyclopedia set because it used to be his only source of entertainment before computer games & the internet. My father's attached to every single piece of furniture that we had.

Our neighbours are some Indonesian factory workers who rented the unit, so they gladly picked up some of the hand-me-down furniture, no matter how battered they looked.

Miraculously, the cleaning bug hit my dad as well. We were going at the spring cleaning for 3 days in a row while he sat back, watched Astro channels and practised his music, till on the 4th day, he too decided to clear out some of the old books, papers and junk he stores in his room. And the reason? So that he could reuse some of the old furniture that I was planning to move out from my room. Better yet, having not enough space to organise his stuff, he went and bought himself a ceiling-high bookcase from Carrefour.

Yes, I live with a family of hoarders, and I am one myself.

----------

It was hard for me to let go of some of the stuff I had accumulated - old letters from pen-pals in the early 90s, soft toys and cute presents given by friends, birthday and festival cards from school friends, my old study notes and mind maps from university days (all painstakingly handwritten and drawn with colour pens), and even all my report cards dating back to kindergarten!

I'm a sentimental soul.

But with my boyfriend's help, I just closed my eyes and threw all of them away. It's not that I do not cherish them and wish to keep them, but my room (which I share with my brother) has absolutely no more space to accomodate all these stuff!

After I graduated from university and started working, I've amassed a fairly good collection of clothes, shoes, handbags, magazines, novels, and music CDs. My poor 98 sq ft room just didn't have the space to house them all together with my old sentimentalities. Sooner or later, they just had to go.

Storing, arranging & packing
So far, I've only moved in a new table-cum-bookshelf from Ikea. I'm still waiting for my new 4-ft wardrobe that's coming tomorrow (they weren't working during the Raya holidays). It's beige with sliding doors, and it's twice as large as my old one. Also, we plan to get a new bookcase for all my novels, magazines and other useful books.

Even with the moving in of these 3 new furniture, the room will still look relatively neat ('cause I bought lotsa storage boxes to store things) and a more spacious room arrangement. The trick is in organising your stuff and buying the right furniture!

My brother has also got a new 4-ft wardrobe and wall-mounted bookshelf. He claims his worldly possesions occupied only 1/3 of the stuff in our room. Well, I beg to differ cause I helped him throw away a lot of his old college notes, books and other stuff that I found in our old bookcase while he was away in Cameron Highlands for 3 days... *Shhh!* Don't tell him!

When it's all in, and my room's all spick and span, I think I'll post up a photo for you guys to see!

----------

The famous education & careers adviser, doctorjob, wishes you 'Happy Deepavali' and 'Selamat HARI RAYA Aidilfitri'!

* Deepavali: Festival of lights celebrated by the Hindus
** Hari Raya Puasa: A Muslim celebration after a month of fasting during the Islamic month of Ramadhan

Right Vs Happy

2005-10-23T01:35:00.000+08:00

The long version of this entry's title actually reads: "Doing what is right Vs Doing what makes us happy".

I just came back from a movie with two of my best friends -- EC and SC.

EC's an old schoolmate I've known for over 10 years. He likes to take down the pegs on my shoulders and deflate my ego in his free time. Yet he is the best guy friend I ever knew - his sound advice, broad shoulders (for me to cry on) and moral support have lifted me out of the depths of depression more times than I can count.

SC is my 'elder sister' (tai ka jeh) from a previous company; we've hit it off since the first few months I worked there and shared so much joys & pains of our work there, our loves & heartbreaks and friendships with our colleagues-turned-excolleagues-turned-friends. It's amazing to see how strong bonds form out of undergoing some difficult times and how it bring us closer and dearer to one another.

By a stroke of good timing and lucky coincidence, two of my best friends in the world had the opportunity to meet each other. I'm happy that they did :)

But... I digress...

EC's girlfriend had 2 extra free tickets to the Charity Premiere for the movie 'April Snow' on Saturday, 22nd night and I happened to call him at the right time. It's a Korean movie starring Bae Yong Joon (of 'Winter Sonata' fame) and Son Ye Jin.

In a nutshell, the movie is about a man & a woman whose spouses were having an affair together and got involved in a car crash. The man & woman met at the hospital as strangers, to take care of their unconscious spouses. From the heartbreaking truth of their spouses having the extra-marital affair, the two of them become friends, and eventually became lovers themselves.

The movie got me thinking ~ how many times have we done things that make us happy (like in the case of the movie, starting that affair though they know they themselves or others will get hurt by it eventually) vs doing things that are right and noble (e.g. keeping to their marriage vows though their partners have done them wrong).

I have to admit, I've done the former much much more than the latter, like

Saying hurtful/sarcastic things to the ones I love because it makes me feel good at that time or because I refuse to let down my ego, but regretting it ever so much after that
vs
Biting my tongue becuase I know they are right and they scold/reprimand me

because they love me.

Staying up till 4am to read a good book/watch a wonderful movie though I end up

yawning more than 20 times at work the next day

Being a good girl and sleeping early so I can go to work fresh (and on time!).

Indulging $$$ in some luxuries such as pretty clothes or a delicious meal

Saving it up for something more worthwhile in the big big future I dream of.

I am a woman of more indulgence than restraint, of more spontaneous than well-thought through action.

But thank goodness, I am not always like that.

At many other times, I am also sensible, practical, realistic and use my common sense (though I often wish I'm more practical than what I am now).

In my life, I've done daring, stupid things in the name of love. And though they've caused me great trepidation and sometimes embarassment, in hindsight, I wouldn't want to do it any other way.

If not, how would I have learned to accept rejection gracefully? Or how would I have discovered that 'thumping heart' feeling you get when you express yourself looking right into his eyes? And how would I have steeled myself to make the first move to secure the guy that I think is the right one for me?

Life is about taking risks. Risks made in the name of love can be extremely stupid and hurt you deeply. But I think it is worth it.

To quote an old cliche: 'It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all.'

It rings true for me, does it for you?

--------------
Disclaimer: I DO NOT support extra-marital affairs, but I am all for going the extra mile for the right person in the name of love.

P/s: A piece of advice - once you have loved and lost, it is better to let go and look back with a smile. Your lover may have hurt you with the departure, but imagine if you had never got to experience the love you shared, the warmth and the cloud 9 feeling at that point in your life. Wasn't it wonderful while it lasted? Forgive, and move on... You will enjoy life much better without the dark shadow of that thorn embedded in your heart. Be thankful that he/she who left you had the realisation early, rather than later, when you could be stuck with a home mortgage and 2 kids.

Resolutions

2005-10-22T19:11:00.000+08:00

I have just finished a 5-week course on Meditative Life in Action: A Dialogue conducted by Bro Hor Tuck Loon every Saturday, 3pm @ SJBA. For this dialogue course, I've had to set aside my responsibilities or leave early from other activities like helping to decorate the vihara for Mooncake Festival (17/9), the Buddhist Business Network Members Gathering (24/9) a relaxing lunch with MS at Bangsar (1/10), lunch with colleagues after our retreat at Gohtong Jaya (7/10). And I must say I'm proud not to have missed a single session.

Although... I had to miss the 6th session (follow-up movie-viewing + discussion session) as Des & I plus 2 other friends drove to Penang to attend Keat's wedding.

The past 6 months have truly been very hectic and tiring for me; I had 12-13 hour workdays and stress from work (to chase on sales + planning for the postgrad event), and at the same time I tried to keep up with all the responsibilities and social obligations that I chose to commit to.

Of course, I'm still human, and along the way, I've suffered from mild depression, had thoughts of losing hope/quitting, trashed things out with friends and family and lashed out at my darling boyfriend when I'm in the darkest of moods. And yet, I survived through it all. I don't know how I managed to do it, but I did. Family & friends' support made a huge difference, and regular visits to the temple kept me s-a-n-e (and remain kind to others).

All in all, I guess it was a really good learning experience for me. They say that you can't grow if you don't have any challenges in life. I used to hate obstacles and difficult times - I always wondered why I couldn't have it easy like *some* people - they were born beautiful/rich/charming/confident/talented and things just happened easier in their lives compared to mine.

Then one day it dawned upon me that Life is NOT Fair. Not in the bitter sense of the phrase, but in the positive sense.

If we had no challenges in life, then how could life would never be as exciting & interesting as it is now -- we never know where the bend in the road leads us to.

If we were all born equal and the same, then we won't have the opportunity to have so many friends and colleagues (or even people on the street) who add so much colour into our life.

If we all had our dreams come true all the time, then we'll never be able to appreciate the good things that happen to us and feel the exhilaration and happiness after getting a 5-figure sales commission after a year's effort/running a 10km marathon/wrapping up a mega-project/paying the downpayment for our first house after a long spell of saving up hard for it.

These are all the results of great effort, dedication, discipline, a little bit of luck and sometimes sacrifice too.

I know 31 December 2005 is still about 2 more months away. But I feel like I've just closed a chapter in my life with the postgrad project executed with great success & attention from all quarters. And now I am ready to start a new chapter.

I decided to make some resolutions for the year end till 2006. Of course, I foresee that I may modify it due to change in time and priorities, but here they are for as long as I choose to stick to them. (Hopefully I can say I've crossed it out because I've achieved them).

(In no particular order) I resolve to:

Practise more focus & discipline during work hours so I can hit my target faster & leave office earlier in 2006
Lose 5kg by 31 Jan 2006
Improve my financial situation with prudent spending & appropriate investments
Be more loving and caring towards my darling Desmond
Meditate at least 3 times a week and go for a 1-week retreat at least once a year
Cultivate loving-kindness towards everyone in my life, even the tea lady
Practise a healthier lifestyle - exercise more regularly and avoid oily & junk food
Keep in touch with close friends more often via one-on-one meetings, gatherings, messenger, email or phone
Slow down a little in my life - take more time out for myself to stop & smell the roses and not tire myself with too much unnecessary social/work commitments
Start work on my action plan for results to be seen 5 years from now (2011)

If you see me breaking my resolutions or giving myself excuses not to keep them, please give me a strong REMINDER yea!

AJ over & out...

postgradasialive! 2005

2005-09-22T21:47:00.000+08:00

For final year students, fresh & experienced graduates

a ONE-OF-ITS-KIND postgraduate study fair

29 September 2005

Hotel Nikko, Kuala Lumpur

Opening Hours: 1:00 - 9:00pm

Admission is free

THE FAIR AT A GLANCE

Local and international postgraduate course providers
Financial information to fund your postgraduate studies
Talks and expert advice on postgraduate study
Free postgradasia booklet for all registered visitors
Sexy postgrad essentials up for grabs!

-> REGISTER NOW!
www.doctorjob.com.my/postgradasia

Secret tip! Pre-register yourself online to receive an additional bonus to win yourself those sexy postgrad essentials.

A Swiss surprise in Sungei Wang

2005-09-21T03:29:00.000+08:00

Have you ever experienced this - sometimes, when we are having difficulty or feeling a bit down facing up to all the challenges in life, a good thing happens (no matter big or small) and the whole world brightens up for us.

Today, something exactly like this happened to me.

No, I am not talking about receiving a bouquet of my favourite flowers from my dearest darling (though I would like that very much, it's been a while), nor am I talking about striking the lottery overnight.

It's much, much more simpler.

As you have read from my previous post, I'm having one of the busiest times at work due to several of my company's publications coming out at the same time, having to do client servicing for invoices, meeting them to pass the magazines, and of course, THE event of the year that I've been working my butt off for - the postgradasialive! 2005 postgraduate study fair happening next Thursday, September 29th (more about that later).

Today, my colleague and I planned a distribution route all around KL city to pass out the event postcards, posters and booklets to various planned drop-off points. We knew that it was going to be a long and tiring day out in the hot sun, and my car was so overloaded with books and stuff that it looked like a delivery van/lorry!

Also, as is so typical of me, I've left to the very last minute the submission of the form and payment for a women's workshop this Saturday that I'm signing my Mum up for. (Forgive me, Mum, was just too busy with work to even stop and breathe). To redeem myself, I decided to send the form & payment via Poslaju so it would arrive within the next 2 days to ensure that my Mum would still get a seat in that workshop.

Since our route will be passing by Sungei Wang Plaza, my colleague suggested that we post the envelope at the post office there.

And so, at about 1.00pm we parked my car at Berjaya Times Square, did all the drop-offs then proceeded to Sungei Wang Plaza to post my envelope and have lunch at the same time. My colleague led me to POS Malaysia located on the 3rd floor (or was it the 4th? Don't ask me, I can really get lost in Sungei Wang). So anyway, while we were walking to the post office, we passed by a food court with no signboard and no name. It looked like it had just opened for business. Inside we saw open-concept kitchens, and some cosy corners with cushions, as well as chairs with cow-inspired designs. Interesting! It peaked my interest and I thought the layout resembled Marché, the Swiss-based restaurant that just opened an outlet in The Curve, Mutiara Damansara in Petaling Jaya not too long ago.

View from inside, Marché Movenpick Restaurant, The Curve

But duty calls first, so we went over to the Post Office to post my precious envelope before discussing how to fill our growling stomachs. I persuaded my colleague to try that 'open-concept food court that we passed just now' to check out the food as I was really curious what it was. When we reached, I walked up to the waiter there, and asked, 'Is this Marché?' and he replied 'Yes, we are just opened'.

Since my colleague had not tried Marché before and wanted to, we took our tickets and entered the restaurant. What I noticed was that this Marché is quite different from the first outlet at The Curve. It is really spacious (I mean really! You can do a breakdance on some of the spaces in between tables), and there was more Asian food stalls than usual - there was bak kut teh (*yummy pork!*), Hong Kong cuisine (tong sui), Japanese Ramen and Teppanyaki besides the usual rosti, sausages, Euro grill and pastry/cake stalls. We were thinking what to eat, knowing the tasks that still laid ahead of us required strength and sustenance to last us till 5pm at the very least. So we skipped all the stalls and went for the pasta stall (the queue at Euro grill was too long anyway). I had also earlier warned my colleague that the food at Marché could be quite expensive if you choose meat dishes or eat a large variety of dishes.

So we ordered 2 tomato chicken spaghetti dishes for us both and were about to ask the price of each plate (there was no price tag at all, really odd) but someone beat us to it. To which the waiter replied, 'Oh, you don't have to pay anything. Today is our Trial Run and all food is served free.'

My eyes widened and I looked at my colleague who turned to me with exactly the same expression. I clarified with them again, and they said yes, today is their Trial Run (it was the their first day open) and there's no charge for any food served. No wonder there's no price tag displayed anywhere!

Well, realising the *gold mine* that we had accidentally stumbled upon on a normal hot afternoon in KL running our errands, we just went a little crazy after that, ordering everything that was worth ordering that we felt we could finish in our limited 'lunch hour'.

We had tomato chicken spaghetti, grilled salmon with salad, tong sui, fruit juice and a slice of cake EACH. It was a most satisfying and delightful lunch. I tell you, a few other customers were also like us, walking around carrying the plates of food to their tables with a grin on their faces. The best thing with this outlet is, if I'm not mistaken, they serve pork. My colleague claimed that she saw them serving pork knuckle and I saw with my own eyes the chunks of meat in the bak kut teh that cannot be mistaken for chicken (or beef (yuck can you imagine bak kut teh with beef?)). Oh, I do, do hope they serve pork. The pork knuckle at Marché is HUGE and heavenly and to taste it you'd need to travel all the way down to Singapore which has 2 Marché outlets.

Oh yeah, aside from having more Asian stalls, there were also newer concepts for their dining areas - I noticed a Middle Eastern room (pottery, hanging tapestries), a Japanese room and a Malay room (attap roof). Nice!

Well, looks like Sungei Wang's latest restaurant, Marché, will draw larger drones of people into the mall, if Marché's popularity worldwide is anything to go by.

My colleague and I just couldn't believe our luck to have passed by and bumped into Marché the first day they opened and conducting their Trial Run. We savoured the yummy food and enjoyed the ambience (they were playing Mandarin songs over the PA system too!). But all too soon, it was time to get back on the road to complete our deliveries and try to head back to the office by 4pm.

The traffic was also surprising - where it would normally take us 45 minutes to an hour to reach the office, it only took us 20 minutes today! Surprise, surprise...

All in all, in the gloom of 'darkness', sometimes the sky clears just enough to allow a ray of light shine in. Today was just such a day. (Though I am not in gloom, but have just been extremely & impossibly busy and stressed out with the event, staying up late and waking up early in mornings just to get all the work done).

I'm sorry guys, if you're thinking of visiting Marché Sungei Wang to take advantage of all the *free food*, the Trial Run is only for one day. Believe me, we asked and probed them about how long it would last (perhaps we could return the next day, hehe), but too bad - the fact still stands. I guess they know how kiasu Malaysians are and wouldn't want the place to be swarmed. As it is, there wasn't any sign outside the restaurant that said it was a Trial Run nor did any waiters at the door inform us about it. They are real smart, eh?

Another day down in history for me, and a new day beckons.

I wonder what little surprises Wednesday 21 Sept would hold for me?

Nobody relaxes on Sunday anymore

2005-09-17T01:40:00.000+08:00

(Also known as "My Crazy Week, and Weekend")

Monday, 12 Sept
Left office 2 hours later than planned for visits to clients. Only managed to visit 2 out of 5! Came back just on time for meeting at office, 4pm. Worked till 10.30pm on urgent workstuff. Computer hanged thrice! Got home past 11. Had dinner and slept relatively early.

Tuesday, 13 Sept
Meeting client at 10.30am *rush*rush*rush*. Meeting didn't go so well but what was worst was the comments my colleague gave me... post-mortem. But I told myself, 'Ok... Just b-r-e-a-t-h-e, stay positive and concentrate on the message.' Drove all over KL in the hot sun, meeting clients to pass our booklets/posters/postcards. Got back to office at 3.30pm, in time for meeting at 4pm. Left late, trying to finish URGENT stuff. Met JL at A&W from 11pm-1am. Slept at 2am.

Wednesday, 14 Sept
Stayed in the office the whole day. Tried to catch up with work but interruptions aplenty. For a good cause anyway, for the event on 29th Sept. Only had some peace at the end of the day. Worked late again and turned up for appointment with SS 1 hour late. Yakkity-yak. Came home around 12am and did some office work. Slept at 3.30am.

Thursday, 15 Sept
Woke up early & got to office by 8.30 ^_^ Own plans for work screwed up due to 1st Commandment: 'what i say, you must do Now'. So went out to deliver things all over KL again. All hot and bothered towards the end, accidentally left sunglasses at client's place. Got back just in time for PG meeting, started 1 hour late, but for the first time it went quite well. Worked on some more 'urgent' stuff. Left office for meeting at vihara and arrived 1 hour late. By that time was dozing off while driving and walking like a zombie. Turned into a zombie at 12 am when my brother came back and woke me up from the couch and blurrily I asked him a question, "What day is it?". I must be having a dream that it was already Saturday.

Friday, 16 Sept
Wanted to go to client's place first thing in the morning but the things I'm supposed to pass to her not prepared yet. Went into office first. Booklets F-I-N-A-L-L-Y arrived! Thus, had to delay timing of leaving the office due to packing of booklets, etc. But really glad to have T back to work, he jumped straight into action. Finally left at 12pm. Lunch near old Thrifty. Delivering invoices, booklets, kits all over PJ for myself and on behalf of SY & SF. Dashed off to Cyberjaya for another meeting with client. Back to office by 6pm. Phew! 'Mock meeting' but actually celebration of D's birthday. Zipped off 2-3 emails then left. Arrived a bit late for friend's wedding dinner and sat 4 tables away from old Buddies. Walked back & forth to catch the action happening there. Not fun, but food was quite good. Tai Thong Imperial Palace at Jaya Square. You should try it. Posh place, but for weddings, the waiters inexperienced & the speakers system need to be improved.

Saturday, 17 Sept (i.e. tomorrow)
What can I say? 11am Fashion workshop by Studio & The Island Shop at MPH 1-U. Gotta give it a miss due to commitment to deco team for vihara Mooncake Family Nite. Plan to go shop-shop-shopping for supplies & materials, then do cut-cutting, paste-pasting, hang-hanging for the stage etc. Meditation dialogue at 3. Dinner for mooncake nite starts at 6.30pm. JH's coming - he's back from Pg a while. Choir, orphans, gifts, clowns, balloons. Sounds more like a birthday party but it's actually the celebration of a traditional Chinese festival with some underprivileged children. Should end by 10-10.30pm. Then we move on to our next programme - birthday surprise for a YS junior. Happy birthday V!

Sunday, 18 Sept (also the Mid-Autumn Festival Day in the Chinese calendar)
The day of the Sabbath. Supposed to be a day for rest, reflection & togetherness according to the Christians. Plan to go to gym early in the morning, 'cause have not gone the whole week. Then off to my friend MW's place for some discussion and work. Before the sun sets, I plan to go back to the place where I spend 60% of my life in - my workplace - to compile some stats for an important presentation next week and 'catch up' with work. Back to SJ for dinner. Then, maybe, just maybe... I'll finally get to r.e.s.t.

And then the cycle repeats once again, the following week.

THIS is my life.

* * *

It's a change emblematic of a societal shift, where the day traditionally known for rest, reflection and togetherness is now filled with work, chores and errands.

Nobody relaxes on Sunday anymore
~ newspaper article in Arizona Replubic, 17 Jul 2005

Red card, red summons

2005-09-04T12:32:00.000+08:00

It's funny.

I did not get any hint of friends' weddings this year but in a span of 1 week, I have heard of 2 - Tsu Jiau (16 September), Keat (15 October, Penang), Chee Yee (16 October, Raub!) - and have to prepare myself for a few more next year - Sue San (after CNY 2006), Shih (mid-2006).

So many "summonses". I'll be SO broke in the next 2 months!

Weddings are often occassions to celebrate the union of 2 people who decide to spend the rest of their lives together as lovers and companions through the ups and downs of life.

In my ~Dreamworld~, I've always imagined weddings to be simple and fuss-free. Friends and relatives come together to rejoice and congratulate the happy couple; it is also an opportunity to catch up with old friends or relatives who come from near and far.

But, more often than not, a wedding is one of the most complex events that one could organise...

First & foremost, weddings are expensive in this 21st century - the wedding photography, the gown (rented or made), the invitation cards, the car & its decorations, the new bridal chamber, the tables for the wedding dinner, the wedding favours... the list goes on. Large weddings (20 tables & above) often cost a minimum of RM20,000 and may even come up to RM100,000 (if you opt for a 5-star hotel, a tailor-made wedding dress with Swavroski crystals and other luxuries).

Secondly, there are more rituals and traditions to follow than you can count on 10 fingers (especially Chinese superstitions) - and woe betide any couple who doesn't observe these rituals - may the gods have mercy on you when the relatives' tongues start wagging.

Both the bride & groom's family will want a say in how it is organised and who to invite.

Seating positions and tables have to be allocated properly to avoid eruptions of family feuds that already exist or may happen because it wasn't.

And for most of us Malaysian Chinese, we are caught in between a traditional wedding with all the rites & rituals as part of the package and the dream of having a Westernised wedding (small receptions, church weddings, garden parties).

Some of us have embraced religions such as Christianity or Theravadan Buddhism and may not think the traditional Chinese rituals and superstitions are worth observing - the roasted pig to be presented to the bride, the bright red decorations for the bridal chamber that are full meanings and hidden messages and not forgetting the do's and don'ts to obey to invite good luck (more wealth & more children *very important*) and avoid bad luck. I'm sure there are times that this may cause a rift between the couple and family members who think the rites should be observed.

+_+

Whatever it is, when all's said and done, though we often say we have been issued a "summon" when we receive a wedding invitation card in a pink envelope, a wedding is still a call for celebration. Just think about it - the RM50-100 that we put in the little ang pau (red packet) IS value for money when you have the wonderful opportunity to meet and chat with long-lost friends/relatives, to enjoy the filling 8 to 10 course dinner and to gulp down all the booze you can drink in one night.

Now isn't that a grand celebration for everyone?

"Blogging will kill you!"

2005-08-29T21:24:00.000+08:00

This is not the headlines of any newspaper article I've read recently. It's what 2 people who are closest to me have been warning me since they witnessed the birth of my blog. Of course, since one of them happens to be my brother who stays in the same house as I, perhaps there is an ounce of truth in that...

Let me explain.

I started this blog because I like to pen my thoughts. I used to write pages and pages in my diary and I have collected 5 whole books of my own ramblings - celebrations and joys, woes and blues. At other times, I can talk (and whine) incessantly to whomever would listen - of late Des has become my most frequent victim (sorry darling!).

But... I can't seem to blog as naturally as my friends do. I just can't understand how they find the time to post something a few times a week, and long & interesting articles they are too! Perhaps, unlike me, they are able to access the internet regularly, and have the time to sit for at least a few mins a day blogging.

Me? I'm just an obsessive-compulsive perfectionist. You won't believe how many teeny weeny details that I've changed about this blog since I started it. Some of those changes may not even be visible to the naked eye! (Ok, I'm exaggerating). And that's the reason why I haven't been posting any articles lately - 'cause I've been busy adding a link here, a comma there and changing the colour somewhere...

Of course, the second reason is that I am extremely super-busy. Ask anyone who knows me well enough and they'll tell you.

On top of working on average 10 hours daily, at the current moment I also have the following weekly activities:

gym (twice a week)
date my darling (2-3 times a week)
have dinner with his parents
meet with the committee of the fellowship group from temple
go to the temple for youth activities every Friday
meet up a best friend on a weeknight, AND
meet up with other close friends in gatherings on weeknights or weekends

That, my friend, is more or less what I do with the weeknights and weekends in a typical week!

I'm t-i-r-e-d just listing all of them down.

But I digress. Back to why I was told that "blogging will kill me". It's because with my full and packed schedules each week (and sometimes I also work late till 9 or 10pm), I still try to:

Go online to clear my mailbox (it is hell when you are a member of 6 Yahoo! groups)
Stay in touch with other friends via sms/email
Blog or post up some photos
Read the latest novel that I'm hooked to
Read the newspapers to catch the headlines and any other stories that interest me
Watch some Astro
Wash my clothes once a week

Thus it is not surprising that I end up sleeping at 4 or 5am in the morning on some workdays. Of late, I have been turning up at work with bleary eyes, dark circles, a husky voice and a slower-than-usual brain speed more often than usual.

That is why blogging will eventually "kill" me. Or rather, I would think it is the "I-am-so-tired-but-let's-just-do-this-one-last-thing-before-I-sleep" trait of mine that's causing me to lose all this sleep and eventually one day drop dead at the road side from fatigue and lack of decent food and rest and pushing myself too hard!

~ ~ ~

Don't mind me.

I'm just rambling... as usual.

Sometimes I feel that I just need to rediscover that button in me somewhere that reads 'Slow Down' and take things one step at a time, rather than accomplishing 101 things at once. Other times I think that working with a work-obsessive colleague with high expectations has me going down the wrong end of the road, rather than making me feel more motivated.

So I conclude by saying this to myself - yes, I know one of your mottos is 'Live like there is no tomorrow', but if you don't sleep well or nourish yourself properly and occassionally spend some quality time with your family, there may not BE a tomorrow to live for. Understand, girl?

I am very sure mum will be happy to see me home earlier and more often. Lately she's been nagging about my late nights at the office and late (or shall I say, early!) bedtimes.

Tonight will be the last night I stay in the office till 9.30pm to check mail/blog/post photos/surf the net/read others' blog. Guess I will have to opt for other ways of 'releasing stress' and entertaining myself - like go for a good movie, read a good book from start to end or even taking a nap. Gosh, I have forgotten how it feels to have long, glorious, fulfilling nap.

Cheerios and wish me luck in the 'new' start in my life!

A vegetable or not?

2005-08-11T01:12:00.000+08:00

This is a case in point of why we should not decide to pull the plug for relatives who are in a coma or labelled as a 'vegetable'.

Patient aware of events during 20-year coma

Aug 8, 2005, The Straits Times, Singapore

FOR 20 years, Ms Sarah Scantlin was seemingly unaware of the world around her after an accident sent her into a coma in 1984.

She was hit by a drunk driver and thrown into the path of a second car. The accident left her so badly injured that nobody understood how her body survived, let alone her mind.

But as she laid on her hospital bed, no one knew that something in her brain was mending, CBS News reported.

Six months ago at the Golden Plains Health Care Centre at Hutchinson, Kansas, she shocked her parents and doctors when she began to speak.

It seemed that throughout her 20-year coma, she could see, hear and understand what was going on around her.

Shortly after she awoke, her father asked what she knew about events that had occurred. 'Sarah, what's 9/11?' he asked.

She responded: 'Bad...fire...airplanes...building. Hurt people.'

Other things deep in her brain survived the accident, such as her favourite 1980s song Summer Lovin', CBS News reported.

Imagine if your loved one could h-e-a-r you discuss with beloved family members about whether to proceed or not, and he or she is silently screaming in their non-responsive body - "Don't!! Don't pull the plug! I'm not dead yet, please...... I am still alive... I can still hear you...... Pleeeaaaasse......."

Highlights: Singapore, 22-25 July 05

2005-08-05T02:42:00.000+08:00

The Singapore Night Safari -- The open tram ride brought us quite close to view the animals (and smell them as well ~o^). There were lions, tapirs, *pink* flamingoes, hyenas and elephants, just to name a few. It was a fascinating journey...

Walks around Bras Basah area and stumbling upon The Sculpture House, the NEW National Library and The Awareness Place, a Buddhist bookstore at Bras Basah Complex

Long and satisfying chat with FW, one of my best friends from university, at a famous Chinese restaurant (can't recall the name)

Shop, shop, shopping at Takashimaya, Wisma Atria, Queensway Shopping Centre (you won't believe the prices of the branded sports goods here!), City Link Mall and Borders bookstore

Food... yummy food at Olio's, Marche and that Chinese restaurant which I can't recall the name

Beautiful night views of the Esplanade, Merlion, Fullerton Hotel and bridges at Marina Bay

And last but not least... the wonderful, cozy and memorable times spent with my darling Desmond on the whole trip

< Sweet reunion - Night Safari with Desmond and his training colleagues.

> Satisfied our hunger pangs with Pork Knuckle from Marche!

< If I lived in Singapore, this would one of be my favourite haunts - Prints shop.

> In the twilight zone...

< Esplanade - Theatres on the Bay

> The majestic Merlion

For more photos, please visit www.flickr.com.

Women and Men :: Apples and Wine

2005-07-30T14:16:00.000+08:00

A few weeks ago, I read a letter in the 'Dear Thelma' column from a career woman whom people say have got it all......... the 5C's - career, car, condo, cash and credit card. On the outside, she seems to be living it up and enjoying life - she lives a comfortable life and is able to buy whatever she wants and she gets along superbly with colleagues and friends. But... she is lonely on the inside, wondering why she has not met the Mr Right whom she could settle down with. She turned into a workaholic and goes back to work during weekends in order to climb higher still on the corporate ladder.

I think to myself, is it her fault that she is lonely (shutting herself up in her world and not making the effort to meet more people) or is it a result of life's cards dealt to her?

I've always believed that we are responsible for our own life, and how it turns out. I still do and this is the philosophy which I live by.

Some people may beg to differ, but whatever it is, I'd like to share this with everyone - someone sent me this passage and I would like to dedicate it to my friends and all out there who have yet to find their "special someone".

Apples and Wine

Women....
Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they sometimes take the apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy. The apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.

Now Men....
Men are like a fine wine. They begin as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the mess out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

And... I'd like to add... for the rest who are taken/married, you are also at the top, but you have a 'barrier' that makes it more difficult for other men to reach and grab you!

Singapore - I WAS THERE

2005-07-28T23:33:00.000+08:00

< Sculpture outside The Esplanade, Singapore

I just got back from Singapore on Monday, 25th night. It was a wonderful, enjoyable trip though a bit hectic. Des and I walked till our legs were gonna break (this reminds me of our Melbourne vacation) trying to see and snap all the sights (him) and shop all the shops (me...clothes & him...handphone).

Went back to work on Tuesday, and things got all screwed up from 10.15am onwards. Neglected to bring some very important documents for an important meeting with a very important client. You should've seen the look on my boss' face :-/

*Lesson learned* Never schedule a meeting with an important client first thing in the morning after coming back from a long trip! If you really must, then prepare BEFORE going on the trip!

Anyhow, have uploaded selected photos of my trip to Singapore here for you to have a look. Will post something about my adventures in S'pore later... Chaoz!

Palm Tungsten T

2005-07-21T11:18:00.000+08:00

A friend offered to sell me a Palm Tungsten T at RM400. According to her, the original owner bought it 13 months ago and took care of it extremely well. She also bought many original software to use with it. The good thing is, this is a friend I can trust, so I know her word is true.

Unfortunately, I am a handheld-virgin, so I kinda need some advice on whether I should buy it or not. Some factors to consider:

I have never owned a tech gadget worth more than RM1,500, and I'm not sure if clumsy-me will drop it, spoil it, crash it, or corrupt it.
I've wanted a high-end handheld organiser for years, but never did save up enough to get one. RM400 is just nicely within my budget, as I thought of getting a low-end handheld at about RM600-800.
I've heard and read bad reviews about Tungsten T's screen, that it needs to be recalibrated frequently.
Tungsten T is a model that was release in 2002 so there are newer and better models in the market.

Well.... if anyone out there could give me some advice about this, I would really appreciate it! Please leave me some comments. Thanks!

Singapore, here I come!

2005-07-20T20:14:00.000+08:00

Finally, I settled most of the arrangements for my Singapore trip from 22-25 July. Have booked the Air Asia ticket to JHB, got someone to commit to fetching me there, researched on how to get from Senai International Airport to Singapore, converted my MYR to SGD and of course, found a hotel for my 4D 3N stay there. Can't wait! 2 days more to go!!

Speaking of the hotel, wow, did I ever attempt the most roundabout way to book a hotel in a foreign country. At first I thought of bunking with my darling Desmond at his apartment (where he's staying during his 1-month work and training), but we discovered that he's staying with 3 males, 1 from China and 2 from Vietnam. There's really not much space left and I'm just not comfy being in the same apartment as 4 guys though one of them happens to be my boyfriend! Call me a traditionalist but for the Chinese, this is definitely a no-no!

So I looked up some deals on the Internet and chanced upon a travel package offered by a tour agency in KL. With some help from Desmond, I looked up the hotels' locations and original rates (he enquired from reception) . . . , and it's actually quite a good deal after all. So I decided to go with the package since time was running short. Had to make the payment in full 'cause I was going to arrive there in less than a weeks' time.

The next day, they called and said all the hotels offered under that package were fully booked. They offered 3 alternatives, but one was in Geylang area (I just don't feel comfortable staying there) and for the other two I had to pay a surcharge as it was an upgrade.

Well, to cut a long story short, with limited time and resources (read $$$) in my hands, I managed to finally secure an Internet booking for a reasonable hotel in a good area, and located near 3 MRT stations. Best thing is, it was even *RM136* cheaper than the tour agent's package for a similar class hotel! What a blessing, phew! I was really getting desperate to the point that I'd accept any hotel as long as it was within budget and near an MRT...

So, it's set then. All is done, so I'll be starting on my packing tonight and rest well too. Been really pushing myself lately and coming down with a sore throat, notwithstanding droopy eyes, a pale face and blurness associated with sleep deprivation. Nvm, the thought of seeing my darling in Singapore and all the bright neon and beckoning store lights will give me the strength to have a miraculous recovery in just 2 days time, hehehe. Don't you agree?

Shopaholic Ai Jou.... it's time to wake up from your long slumber!